From MadCap's Couch - Supernatural: "The Magnificent Seven"

Following a lead, the boys and Bobby were not expecting to be face to face with Amber Heard.

When we last left Sam and Dean... okay, let's be real, a lot of things were going on. In particular, Hell was breaking loose and Dean had put his soul on the line in order to bring Sam back to life. Now, we go into Season 3, which was hit with a terror far worse than anything spawned in the pits of Hell... the Writers Guild of America Strike of 2007-2008.

That's not an indictment of the strike, by the way.

Pay your writers, people. It's not that hard.

However, because of that strike, the third Season of Supernatural is the only season in the series to have less than 20 episodes, in this case there are only 16 episodes from "The Magnificent Seven" all the way to "No Rest for the Wicked". Spoiler warning: This won't be ending well for anybody involved.

We get the recap of the previous season set to "Hell's Bells" by AC/DC that goes over the big deal. John is dead, Sam and Dean are out hunting monsters and banging gorgeous women - y'know, the usual. Also, the Yellow Eyed Demon is dead and Mary is avenged... and Dean made a deal with the Crossroads Demon to bring Sam back, being given a single year before the bill comes due.

Oh, and the gates of Hell have burst open, bringing who knows how many demons out onto the Earth.

We start off in Oak Park, Illinois, where as man walks out of his home only to be assaulted and possessed by demonic black smoke whilst taking out the trash. Also, said trash cans wobble about for reasons that are never really explained... though we could headcanon that its the sheer mass of demons escaping from Hell, since it's also accompanied by flickering lights. The demon, in full possession, watches as the strands of smoke head off to possess others, even to the point of completely blacking out the screen.

A week later, Sam is cracking the books to try and get Dean out of his deal. Dean, on the other hand, is having sexy times with a girl set to "You Ain't Seen Nothin' Yet" by Bachman-Turner Overdrive. Bobby calls, having a lead on a case for them... and Sam gets scandalized by walking in on his brother performing some kind of terrible sex act off-screen. It's kind of odd his reaction, since I'm almost sure that Sam has had to have walked in on Dean before... granted, seeing your brother naked is never something you get over, but...

Y'know what? Never mind, let's keep going.

Dean's actually Sam Beckett, waiting to leap.
...look, they can't all be gold.

Sam needs some brain bleach, but Dean is surprised that Sam isn't chastising him for being loose with the ladyfolks.  After a week of no leads, Dean is happy for this war with the demons to get started. Sam tells him to be careful what he wishes for.

They end up at a farmhouse in Nebraska. They break in to find the family on the couch having died of either starvation and dehydration or both despite the fact they were within walking distance of both food and water. They check for sulfur, but a creaky floorboard gets their attention and the trio head out to meet two new hunters - Tamara and Isaac - who Bobby knows. The two teams compare notes and we get a bit of lore about Palo Santo, holy wood from Peru that works like holy water on demons.

Sam makes an awkward attempt at conversation where he asks the two how they got started hunting, making everyone very uncomfortable. A little reminder that nobody gets into hunting just willy-nilly. Dean gets the coroner's report on the family to confirm the cause of death, Bobby saying that if this is a demon attack then it's unlike anything he's ever seen. As they prepare for their next move, Isaac lays it out that he has no interest in partnering with the Winchesters, seeing as they are being blamed as the ones who opened the Devil's Gate.

...I have to assume the demons were putting the word out, because otherwise this is kind of amazingly convenient for them to know just enough about the situation to come to the wrong conclusion.

As night settles in, Bobby checks the door and outside... a blonde woman comes out of the shadow of a tree to stare pensively at the house they're all bunking at.

This is Ruby, played by Katie Cassidy. Saying it now because we're going to learn it later... and I have many, many things to say about Ruby that we cannot get into yet because of spoilers. More on her later.

In a shop somewhere the next day, the demon who possessed the man in the opener speaks to a woman at a shoe shop, convincing her with a touch to go after some very nice, green shoes being held by another woman... who she then beats to death for said shoes. Sam comes in as the police are investigating to find Dean "comforting the bereaved" and pulling the "I'm dying" act when Sam starts to call him out on his BS. Bobby arrives in a nice suit, having attempted to be an attorney for the DA... and discovered that the woman wasn't possessed, she just really wanted the shoes. That said, he doesn't think that this is unrelated, something that Dean confirms when they look at the tapes and find... the guy.

We get a confusing scene where Ruby trails Sam for a bit only to disappear when he looks back, for reasons that aren't made clear, although Sam seemingly knows he's being tailed.

That night, Dean, Bobby, and Sam have tracked down the guy in question - "Walter Rosen" - to a bar outside of town. He apparently went missing the night the Gate opened. Dean wants to jump on the guy when he comes out, but Bobby warns caution... at least until Tamara and Isaac show up and enter the bar. You definitely don't need Admiral Ackbar to know what's about to happen. 

Sam did not think Ruby's alternative Jack O' Lanterns would sell.

Their attempt to take Walter and exorcise him fails immediately, as it's revealed that everyone in the bar is possessed by a demon... including Walter. As Dean and Bobby try to force their way in, Isaac gets touched by one of the demons and then beings obssessively downing a bottle of drain cleaner while Tamara is forced to watch... and the demons laugh in a truly pretty terrifying scene. Isaac dies in unimaginable agony just as the Winchesters and Bobby ram through the door and bring some holy water to the party and pull a screaming, hysterical Tamara out.

Also, Dean gets "Walter" into the trunk before they head out. The demons, needless to say, are rather pissed.

Back at the ranch, Bobby has worked out who they're dealing with: the Seven Deadly Sins. After Dean makes a terrible attempt at a Paul Atreides that he insists is a SE7EN reference, they work things out. The family was touched by Sloth, the woman at shoe shop was touched by Envy ("Walter"), and Isaac was touched by Gluttony at the bar. Tamara insists on going out and killing them all, but Bobby's cooler head prevails even as he does express sympathy for her loss... almost as if Bobby knows what it's like to lose your spouse to the supernatural... maybe just file that in the back for later.

The hunters interrogate a trapped Envy, who says the demons already have what they want: freedom from Hell. We also get some demon vs. human commentary as Envy tears down humanity and uses the hunters as prime examples, including Tamara as a good example of Wrath over something that happened in her past that gets her trying to punch him.

Basically, humans are ultimately just like demons... base instincts... blah blah blah. Envy attempts to tell them that they'll all be slaughtered like the animals they are and that the other Sins will come for him. Dean, in a classic moment of badass, tells Envy that they aren't going to find him, because he's going to Hell. Tamara exorcises Envy.

Dean tries to go for a suicide run while Sam, Bobby, and Tamara run for the hills... which gets shot down immediately. If they go down, then they'll go down together. Tamara comes back in and informs them that Envy's host didn't survive the exorcism.

We get a quiet moment while Sam and Dean prep their arsenal. No words exchanged, but there's clearly plenty of things unspoken right now. The radio kicks on of its own accord and the two prepare for battle, weapons in hand and salt lining every door. The one to step out of the darkness is... Isaac. Or, rather, what is left of him. Profusely bleeding from the mouth, he calls to her and taunts her about their daughter who was killed by something in Michigan. The taunting has its effect, Tamara getting out and breaking the salt line to stab him with Palo Santo... and unfortunately allowing other demons in.

Gluttony targets Bobby, who tricks him into a Devil's Trap.

Lust, who corners Dean and starts trying to work her magic on him. He tricks her into a bathtub full of holy water, because he's Dean Winchester and he basically invented pelvic sorcery.

"That is not how you do the Heimlich!"

Elsewhere, Sam gets cornered by three demons... who apparently all make up Pride. It appears, anyway? It's not very clear. Pride smarmily destroys a Devil's Trap and drops some exposition about how the demons view Sam - without Yellow Eyes around, not very well. Sam's fair game, and it's open season. Ruby pops in and uses her demon killing knife to kill two of the three Prides and gets an assist from Sam for the third.

He naturally asks her who the hell she is. She's cryptic and then leaves.

This will be a recurring theme for all of three-ish episodes. Buckle up.

Oh, and she disappears after Sam tries to find her, because Batman. I guess?

Bobby and the boys burn the bodies and Tamara tends to Isaac's body herself with a hunter's funeral. There were at least two survivors, the people possessed by Lust and Gluttony, but everyone else is dead. Bobby has never heard of a weapon that can kill demons (apart from the Colt, obviously). Sam brings up the very troubling thought that, if the Seven Deadly Sins were unleashed, what else escaped Hell from the Devil's Gate?

Tamara heads off on her own, Bobby telling her not to be a stranger.

She never appears on the show again.

Bobby tells the boys to keep an eye out for omens and leaves. Sam brings up that Tamara mentioned a voodoo priest outside Shreveport that might be able to break Dean's deal. He shoots this down, and Sam's frustration that has been brewing for the episode finally breaks out. Dean's devil may care attitude about his own life has finally gotten to him. Dean explains the terms of the deal - if they try to weasel their way out of the deal, Sam dies.

What Dean did was selfish according to Sam, which Dean agrees with. He tells Sam he's tired... and he wants to go out on his own terms, killing some evil sons of bitches and raising a little Hell. Sam calls him out as unbelievable, which Dean agrees to before they drive off.

"I don't care if Dean says no, I'm going to find the secret Coca-Cola formula..."

The Magnificent Seven gets its title from the 1960 film of the same name (which is itself a remake of a 1954 film called Seven Samurai) in which seven cowboys are hired to take on an entire gang of marauding bandits in order to protect a single Mexican village. Nigh-impossible odds against a foe, being outgunned and outmanned in every sense, so it's an appropriate note to start Season 3 on, given how Season 2 ended with a bunch of demons from Hell being unleashed. The production team really manages to, with very little, show us just how screwed the hunters of the world are now. The game has definitely changed and, for better or for worse, demons are on the menu for a while to come.

Luckily, said demons don't seem to have a plan or agenda... yet, anyway.

Isaac and Tamara serve as sort of mirrors to Sam and Dean's life, having lost a family member and having gone into a life of hunting. Of course, they're doing it as a couple... rather than the solitary existence that John or Bobby have. It's interesting, really, the thought of a full family of hunters... something that will come up a few times in the series to come.

The Magnificent Seven is a pretty good opener for the show. What happened in the finale is still clearly wearing on Sam and, to a lesser degree, Dean and the stakes are higher than they've ever been now. There's an entire world out there swarming with demons and as Dean said in the Season 2 finale: they've got work to do. That bright, shiny moment when the brothers stood over the corpse of the Yellow Eyed Demon is over... and the war has begun.

Next time, a trip into a housing development and Dean reuniting with an old flame spells some trouble for the Brothers Winchester. The Kids Are Alright? Fat chance!