Monday, October 23, 2017

MadCap's Reel Thoughts - "Night of the Demons" (1988)

...and like that, you've seen what is literally the scariest thing about this film. The poster. That's it.

...

No, this is not the set up to a joke, I'm serious. "

Angela is having a party. Jason and Freddy are too scared to come...But you'll have a hell of a time" Har har har. My pimply, flabby white ass.

If my typed sarcasm was an indication, I am not a fan of this movie. I'm aware that it's a cult hit, and I'm frankly at a loss as to why. It's not particularly original despite its promises that are just lawyer friendly enough to avoid copyright infringement, it doesn't bring anything new to the genre (using just about every single haunted house and demonic possession trope), and it absolutely wreaks of the 1980s trying so, so desperately to die.

...probably so they can get out of this movie.

Saturday, October 21, 2017

MadCap's Comic Reviews - "Angel" #7: Time and Tide, Part Three

We now return to our Voyage of the Damned already in progress. When we last left our dynamic duo, Angel and Illyria, they were on a pirate boat in the past where Angelus and Darla had been sent - rather like Team Rocket - blasting off again. While Angel feared for future continuity, he and the depowered Elder God had greater worries, primarily the fact that they were on a boat that was not only under siege by pirates, but had a pest problem that was rapidly getting worse.

Friday, October 20, 2017

MadCap's Game Reviews - "Indiana Jones and the Emperor's Tomb"

The adventure series of Indiana Jones needs no introduction, but I'm going to give one anyway because padding (truly, the greatest horror of all)! Indiana Jones was the brainchild of Steven Speilberg and George Lucas before the former stopped denying the stupider ideas of the latter. The first film, Raiders of the Lost Ark, was intended to be a homage to the old pulp adventure serials that the two had watched and enjoyed in their youth. In particular, the iconic look of Indiana Jones was inspired by Humphrey Bogart's outfit in The Treasure of the Sierra Madre, and that and other serials had a heavy influence on the plots of the original trilogy.

But where does The Emperor's Tomb come into play? Well, directly in canon before Temple of Doom, my personal favorite in the franchise. It's 1935 and Indy begins a trek through the jungles of Ceylon to - in the style of Raiders - recover an artifact. After making his way through a ruined temple, matching wits against ivory hunters, and dealing with a great white crocodile, Indiana does indeed manage to recover the artifact...which turns out, unlike the Idol of the Havitos...to be intrinsically important to yet another quest he finds himself on when a Chinese official and his lovely assistant arrive to inform him of - the search for the tomb of China's first sovereign Emperor, Qin Shi Huang. And thus, another epic adventure begins as Indiana travels from New York City to Prague to Istanbul to Hong Kong...and to Hell itself in his quest!

...well, one of them. Chinese got a lot of Hells.

Tuesday, October 17, 2017

From MadCap's Couch - Tales from the Darkside: "Ursa Minor"

Teddy Ruxpin strikes again!
Portrait of a family, a young couple -Richard and Joan - and their daughter, Susie, living in a happy home...or trying to, at least. Richard's got some problems with drinking and smoking, as well as a bum leg, and Joan is doing her best to make ends meet, working on her masters' degree and trying to make a better life for their daughter.

But there are good moments. Right now, it seems that Richard has gotten her a teddy bear for her birthday...although he doesn't recall giving her the gift in question. As time goes on, strange occurrences take place around Susie. A shattered flowerpot here...some very bear-like pawprints on the wall there...all of which Susie attributes to her teddy bear. At first to Joan's irritation...

Richard, of course, tells her not to worry. It's just a phase that little girls go through, and Susie will soon grow out of it. Nevertheless, he consents to trying to dissuade her from that train of thought with a bear rug. After an argument with Richard and going to bed later in the night (following a waltz into Susie's room where Joan just misses the bear's eyes glowing blood red), Joan wakes up to find Susie in the kitchen...with Teddy, and a bowl of split porridge, and begins to believe that there may indeed be something to her stories about the bear.

After all, Susie couldn't have made porridge on her own...

Monday, October 16, 2017

MadCap's Reel Thoughts - "A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors" (1987)

I'm standing in the night alone
forever together
OHH!!!
With the Dream Warriors
don't wanna dream no more
With the Dream Warriors
and maybe tonight
Maybe tonight, you'll be gone!

I'll go ahead and preface this with the following statement: this is my second favorite film in the franchise after 2. Yes, that's after Freddy's Revenge. I like this film and Freddy's Revenge better than I do the original. While the original is a classic and people rightly love it and cherish it and celebrate it, Freddy's Revenge and Dream Warriors are the only sequels that actually tried to do something different with the franchise.

...besides New Nightmare, but we'll get to that.

Dream Warriors, however, also marks the point where Freddy Krueger made the sharp turn from being a terrifying menace...into being a joke that only was frightening because of his dream powers...and his puns.

Saturday, October 14, 2017

MadCap's Comic Reviews - "Angel" #6: Time and Tide Part Two

Okay, I know what you're thinking. "Hey, Madcap! The last time you did a comic that promised a prize fight, you became the laughing stock of the internet! Because at no point in that comic did either of the two people who were listed on the marquee ever in a fight and, in fact, only had one exchange in which they called each other douchebags!"

Well, I say, "Shut the hell up, voices in my head that compel me to shout random things onto the internet! I actually checked this comic and the title is, in fact, not a lie!"

...I'm secretly very lonely. If you're reading this, please send help.

Friday, October 13, 2017

MadCap's Game Reviews - "Scooby-Doo Mystery"

Scooby Dooby Doo
where are you?!

Yeah, you may not have wanted it in your head, but it's there now. Scooby-Doo has been one of the most surprisingly enduring fixtures in pop culture since...well, since it was first aired on television in 1969. From the creative minds at Hanna-Barbera, who were responsible for so many shows that are still fondly remembered even today, Scooby-Doo has been among many of those beloved shows. One may wonder why, but I really think the answer is simple.

It's one of the most adaptable things for the two main characters: Shaggy Rogers and Scoobert "Scooby" Doo. Why? Because they're both cowards, and everyone can relate to cowards, because that's absolutely how you would act in a situation.

And before you think that's not an endearing character trait, just remember that Falstaff was a coward.

...you guys do know who that is, right?

...because Yahtzee of Zero Punctation already once pointed that out?

Scooby Doo was a show that I was fortunate enough to get to know in it's original incarnation due to my parents having the VHS tapes of several old episodes of the 1969 series. It was great when I was a kid and I still love it to this day. There have been plenty of variations, spin-offs, and reboots over the years, but all the versions that are well remembered stick to the tried and true formula (with some variation in the case of things like Scooby Doo Mystery Inc.) of the original that pretty much everyone can relate to: some kids and their dog driving around in a van and solving mysteries.

...okay, that might not be the best way to word it.