So, 3-D is a stupid gimmick. There, I said it. It has been used all of once to any good effect in a film that had literally nothing else going for it. I am speaking, of course, of Robert Rodriguez's cinematic opus Shark Boy and Lava Girl. But we're not here to talk about that horror movie, we're here to talk about this horror movie. For the third entry in the Friday the 13th series, it was decided to take the series into full-on 3-D! Then Paramount decided the gimmick was stupid and decided not to do it ever again in the series until they sold it off to New Line.
But to catch up on the plot, Friday the 13th Part 3 picks up after the rather ambiguous ending to Part 2, wherein protagonist Ginny (Amy Steele) was being carted away by paramedics while crying out for Paul (John Furey) - a character whose fate is still debated by fans of the series to this day - and Jason seemingly having escaped.
It seems a new bunch of blood bags have been tapped to be the new sacrificial lambs as, despite a murder spree having happened only hours before, people are still coming to Crystal Lake. And yes, Parts 2, 3, and The "Final Chapter" are supposed to all take place within the same week. Can't even begin to get into how much sense that doesn't make without breaking off into another rant. There's only so much crazy I can take in a single review.
Like Part 2, Part 3 does actually take some time to build character so that we actually do care when the bodies start to hit the floor. This is most evidenced in the fact that this entry in the series does actually have a few well loved and fondly-remembered characters, namely Shelley (Larry Zerner), who is responsible for Jason getting his now-iconic hockey mask.
And yes, for the record, that's pretty much the only reason why this film is notable.
The rest of this film is just a very very confusing, trippy mess.
Among the meat sacks is Chris Higgins (Dana Kimmell), who has brought her friends up to Crystal Lake as she's come back up after two years away following an encounter with a disfigured man who left her rather disturbed. And yes, your powers of clairvoyance are quite correct, it was Jason the whole time. Needless to say, her mental state does not even slightly start improving when the death comes for them.
And come it does, eventually forcing Chris to confront Jason and hack him up but good, and then...go insane? It's not made clear, though the climax of the film involves her being in a canoe in the lake to homage the ending of the first movie. In a twist on that, however, she is menaced by Jason on the show, only to be pulled under the water by a zombiefied Mrs. Voorhees.
...or is she? Again, it's not made clear, and she's taken away by the police at the end.
The bizarre part about it is that the opening to The Final Chapter implies that things did happen. Jason's "body" is taken from the barn, his hockey mask still has the axe cut that Chris chopped into it, and other things as well. So...why the reason for the absolutely insane, LSD-inspired drug-fueled insanity?
Maybe they felt it fit in well with the incredibly poor effects for the 3-D. I can't really be blamed for harping on this, seeing as I harp on films for shooting things with the sole purpose of them being in 3--D to this day.
Thanks a lot, James Cameron, you pretentious dick.
The effects are all terrible and it's so blatantly obvious that the shots done to use the 3-D effect were shot specifically for that reason, which couldn't have looked impressive even in 1982. Juggling apples up at the screen? Lifting a bail of hay toward the camera? Crushing a guy's head and having his eye pop out and wiggle at the screen? It's all for naught, I'm afraid. Seriously, I re-iterate, this could not have possibly looked good even in 1982.
The worst part about it is that when Paramount released the box set of the first eight films, Part 3 is converted back to 2-D, which makes a large part of the trick shots in the film completely and utterly pointless. It just looks like everything was very poorly shot because the director was dealing with a hangover every day of shooting from the night before and just could not be bothered.
So, not a bad movie...but it's a weird one. And one that didn't need the 3-D in it, because it ultimately doesn't contribute to anything. And in The Final Chapter they drop it completely for what I'm sure will totally be the last entry into the series.
...right?
Oh, wait, I already made the joke about the first eight films. Crap.
Friday the 13th Part 3 is now available from Paramount Pictures and New Line Cinema.
For the latest from the MadCapMunckin, be sure to follow him on Twitter @MadCapMunchkin.
No comments:
Post a Comment