Monday, November 23, 2020

MadCap's Reel Thoughts - "The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King" (2003)


Okay, c'mon. What else do I have to say about this film that hasn't already been said in the seventeen years since it was released? This was the second highest grossing film of all time until James Cameron decided to crap out Avatar and push Titanic into the spot, it was nominated for eleven Academy Awards and won all of them and the culmination of an epic trilogy that is only matched by the likes of the original Star Wars trilogy in terms of its following and mythos.

The actors involved are at the top of their game, Peter Jackson's directing is as sterling as ever, and the Howard Shore score is so epic in every single scene that he rivals John Williams in terms of memorable music that resonates even now. It's literally the perfect storm of everything, maximum potential finally realized.

And it's good.

It's damn damn damn good!

Let's get into the nitty-gritty. As we discussed last time, Peter Jackson decided to sort of split The Two Towers in half in terms of where to end the second film. The book version of The Two Towers ends with Frodo having been captured and taken into Cirith Ungol - otherwise known as the "all is lost" moment - by Tolkien's pen. Rather than do that, however, Peter Jackson decided to save that for the beginning of this movie, which does diminish the effect a bit in my opinion.

Granted, we had Sam's heartfelt speech at Osgiliath as well as the battles at Helm's Deep and Isengard turning in favor of the good guys and it all ended everything on a high note. . .but The Empire Strikes Back managed to have an overall darker tone, even if it ended on an air of optimism. Granted, the protagonists who aren't Boromir not ever being in any real danger or suffering from combat and the like is a criticism that has been levied against this trilogy many a time.

I don't really care for that criticism, but that's honestly just splitting hairs regardless of which side of the divide you fall on. Whether or not you agree with it, it didn't keep the franchise from becoming one of the highest grossing of all time. Perhaps, indeed, this very review serves no point.

MadCap Crossed The Streams: 8

. . .huh. Didn't know we were still doing that gag.

In any case, we do pick up pretty much where The Two Towers left off. Gandalf, Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli head off to Isengard to meet with Merry and Pippin, who are enjoying their victory. Saruman is. . .what? Oh, they cut that scene? I mean, it feels like of important.

Okay, so they apparently cut the scene where Saruman gets dealt with by - of all people - Grima Wormtongue from the last movie. While I praise the Extended Cuts for giving us more detail, the fact that this scene was cut really irks me in a big way. Given how Sauron was a giant eye that spewed a bunch of whispered babbling, a scene where we have an actual face-to-face antagonist getting dealt with isn't something that should have been skipped over. That seems like a pretty big misstep, instead just giving us a scene of Gandalf declaring "He has no power anymore!" as if he has any damn idea.

. . .pretty sure some Tolkien fanboy is going to be clogging up my mentions for that one.

In the other A Plot, we have Frodo and Sam still being led by Gollum. Through some trickery, Gollum gets Frodo alone and into the eight hairy legs of Shelob. Unfortunately for the giant spider, she is ill-prepared for the three foot whatever walking badass that is Samwise Motherfucking Gamgee (check the Shire's birth records, that is his legal name). 

Meanwhile meanwhile, we have a subplot of Arwen's fate being tied to the Ring. . .for reasons that really don't make any sense and aren't followed up on. Elrond brings Aragorn the sword Anduril, reforged from the shards of Narsil - a weapon wielded by Aragorn's ancestor Isildur - and points him in the direction of an army of dishonored dead that owe a debt to Isildur and his family line.

While this is going on, Gandalf and Pippin (who was stupid enough to use a Seeing Stone and had a near-chat experience with Sauron) ride to Gondor and meet Faramir and Denethor (John Noble). Denethor is a lot more developed and nuanced in the book, but serves here as the Steward of Gondor and has no desire to see Aragorn become the King of Gondor again. You might be thinking this is setting up some tension between the two. . .but no. They never actually meet before Denethor decides to cosplay as the Human Torch.

Basically, he goes from a broken man who has lost all hope in the books to being an asshole who gets an ending that's just straight fire in the movie. Weird, but okay.

All of this leads to a massive battle at Minas Tirith, where Rohan answers the beacons and comes to fight (and Theoden gets what is one of the best Pre-Ass Kicking One-Liners in the history of cinema) to prove just the infinite and ever-expanding universe of no fucks they give as they mow down hundreds of orcs. Aragorn busting out his ghost army, and Eowyn topping it off by slaying the Witch-King of Angmar.

. . .yeah, I'll give Peter Jackson credit, he at least gives Eowyn more to do in this and the previous film, beyond just getting a mention in The Two Towers and then suddenly showing up to the battle here. So, kudos there! Point for the book over the film.

Kind of have to take that point back when we get back to Arwen being essentially and confusingly useless, but never you mind that.

All of this leading into the final battle at the Black Gate of Mordor, all to distract Sauron long enough to let Frodo and Sam get to Mount Doom. Will they succeed?

. . .well, I mean. . .duh.

Unfortunately, the victory over Sauron isn't where the film ends. Another thing that this film in particular gets maligned for is the (thanks to editing) four or five fake endings of the film before the actual one occurs. There's Frodo and Sam on the side of Mount Doom as it erupts following the destruction of the Ring. . .there's Frodo waking up to find the (remaining) Fellowship there to greet him. . .there's the crowning of Aragorn as King and a heartwarming scene where everyone bows to the hobbits for their sacrifices in saving Middle-Earth. . .there's the hobbits returning to the Shire and finding it just the same as ever as though no one has any idea what they've been through (cutting out the Scouring of the Shire from the book) and Sam getting married. . .and then we finally at the absolute end have Frodo getting on the ship with Gandalf, Elrond, Bilbo, and Galadriel to go to the Undying Lands, leaving Sam behind with the Red Book of Westmarch to continue on as the keeper of the story.

Literally, any one of these endings would have been perfect. However, it is almost as if Peter Jackson decided "Y'know what? I'm gonna do them all." He did this, and he made the second highest grossing film of all time.

At the time anyway. The point is, that hairy little man from New Zealand must have been doing something right. This would unfortunately turn on him in the years to come, but that is a story for another time.

The Return of the King continued the tradition of being innovative in both practice and CGI effects as well - with the Battle of the Pelennor Fields in particular being one of the high water marks for the industry even to this day. As I stated before, the cast is top-notch, the direction a labor of love that shows in every frame, and the score is some of the best in the entire trilogy.

What else can I say?

It's just damn good. Damn, damn, damn, damn good. Think about that. Think about all the hilarious amounts of crap we've seen since Sword and Sorcery 2020 began. 

 Barbarian QueenHighlander II: The QuickeningRed Sonja.

Fucking Deathstalker.

The Return of the King (and, to lesser degrees, the first two films in the franchise) is what some of those films were trying to be. A labor of love that showed us swords, showed us sorcery, and was both beloved by fans and critics alike. Far from the low-rent, shot on shitty-o movies of the 1980's that were a dime a dozen, this is the apex of everything that sword and sorcery can be at its finest.

Best part about this? 2020 still isn't over yet!

That's right, folks! We have one month left in this, the year of the infinite Coronavirus (again, unless you're reading this in the future. Hello, future people!), and one month left in November. You may think it's going to be the perfect time to knock out Peter Jackson's Hobbit films, and you would be right to think that.

However. . .I'm not going to.

There are still plenty of films I haven't covered and they deserve some attention as well. So no more stroking of Peter Jackson's ego and instead, next time, we'll be looking at something different.

The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King is brought to use by New Line Cinema and Wingnut Films.

For the latest from the MadCapMunchkin, be sure to follow him on Twitter @MadCapMunchkin.

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