Yeah, I'm not going to lie here, when I'm recommending a Marvel movie to one of my friends (y'know, of the three people who haven't seen a Marvel movie at this point) Thor: The Dark World is not my go-to choice. It's not because the film is bad - with the exception of Iron Man 3 (which I covered in detail a few weeks ago), I'd be hard pressed to call a film in the MCU bad - but because it's, frankly just...boring. It has good moments and isn't overall unwatchable, but it's not a film I find myself revisiting often whenever I get in the mood to watch a Marvel film.
As a testament to this statement, I will say that I've seen this movie three times: once in the theater, once on DVD at my home, and then once on DVD at home when I went to review the movie.
I think a large problem is that, coming off of The Avengers, Dark World isn't exactly sure what it wants to be. The first Thor film had a clear focus - it was a Shakespearean drama about two brothers vying for the throne of their father. Even Thor: Ragnarok had a clear focus as a fun space romp much in the late 80s vein (admittedly because of the success of the Guardians of the Galaxy films, but that's neither here nor there). But Thor: The Dark World? It doesn't really follow the rule of successful superhero movies using another genre to disguise themselves.
For example, Captain America: The First Avenger worked well because it was a war film that just so happened to have the fantastic superhero elements within it, Spider-Man: Homecoming worked because it was a coming of age film that just so happened to have the fantastic superhero elements within it, Logan worked because it was a gritty western that just so happened to have the fantastic superhero elements within it, and so on....
Thor: The Dark World is sort of an action-adventure, but also a romance, but also a disaster film, the problem with that combination being that it really doesn't succeed in pulling off any of those. With that said, let's get into the nitty-gritty.
This plot is really only notable for the fact that there's an Infinity Stone involved in it.
Spoiler alert for a movie that's pushing five years old.
But many many years ago, before the time of the internets, Odin's father Bor fought against the insidious Dark Elves. Not having the powers of Lolth to call upon in the Marvel universe (which I'm sure will change soon enough at the rate Disney's buying up things), the Dark Elf leader Malekith (Christopher Eccleston) has elected to use a doomsday weapon known as the Aether. However, before they can use it, the Asgardians kick their ass...because we can't very well have Malekith kill off the universe before the previous movies could happen. Not that I'm saying a time paradox would have livened things up, but...actually, yes. Yes, that's actually exactly what I'm saying.
Having the Aether, but deciding wisely that such a powerful weapon should not be left in their hands, Bor does the only rational thing and decides to hide it on Earth. Given how Odin decided to hide the Tesseract on Earth by the time of Captain America: The First Avenger, you can't fault an effective hideaway method.
This kind of leads to a minor segue I have with the issue of the Infinity Stones being so immensely dangerous in the MCU. It's weird, and not in the usual "comics are weird" weird. The Infinity GEMS (which I'm still going to call them even if Marvel editorial demands otherwise) in the comics were not nearly so deadly in any comic I've read. Sure, they were reality-breaking and that could be very easily turned on you if you weren't particularly smart or careful, but just touching them without anything between the two of you didn't do anything.
While this led to one of my favorite scenes in the first Guardians of the Galaxy (which we'll be getting to later), I'm still trying to figure out why they did this. But, at the very least, Guardians and the first Avengers films had cool items to contain the power of the Stones. The Avengers gave us the Tesseract cube and Loki's scepter, and Guardians gave us the Orb that serves as the Maguffin for the entire plot. And the mighty Bor, father of Odin, the first lord of Asgard and protector of the Realm Eternal, decides that the best place to put an Infinity Stone that can literally erase reality...
...is in a stone column.
As far as mystic prisons go, it's no space dumpster.
But yes, the Aether remains on Earth around a bunch of humans who would surely misuse that uber-destructive power if they ever got a hand on it (good job there, Bor) until the plot requires it. And require it it does when the Asgardians learn of a mystical event called "The Convergence". Rather than getting an amusing look at the Marvel multiverse, the Convergence is apparently an event where all the Nine Realms will line up perfectly and thus cause a bunch of random portals to open between them because science...magic...whatever.
But this allows Jane Foster (Natalie Portman) and her intern Darcy Lewis (Kat Dennings) as well as (eventually) Erik Selvig (Stellan Skarsgård) to get involved. They start investigating the portals opening up and Jane ends up getting herself a nice heaping dose of possession by the Aether. Thor (Chris Hemsworth) brings her to Asgard for assistance, only for the Dark Elves to reveal themselves to have been sleeping the whole time waiting for the Aether's return.
Nice job breaking it, dumbass!
Now, the only real problem I have with this set up is that Selvig somehow ended up in a mental institution after The Avengers. Granted, Loki's reign of terror was dramatically terrible for that sixteen blocks of New York, but he ended up here? In London? Tony Stark couldn't have piped up in his defense or at the very least gotten him to somewhere where he might have a shot at getting slightly better treatment?
But no, this set up isn't bad. The problem stems from two things - one...it's agonizingly slow. Two...we have more of the forced romance between Thor and Jane. That second one, in particular, just grinds my gears. It stands apart from every other Marvel romance thus far (and I say thus far because I know someone will bring up the out of nowhere Banner/Romanoff romance in Age of Ultron, but I'll get to that) in that it just...doesn't work.
In the Iron Man films, the romance between Tony and Pepper Potts works because they've both known each other for a long time and show an intimacy with one another that two people who barely know each other wouldn't have.
In Captain America: The First Avenger, Steve Rogers fought alongside Peggy Carter for years and it made their last kiss and Steve's crazy into the Arctic waters all the more tragic.
It also unfortunately led to the only bad scene in Winter Soldier, but we'll get to that in later.
Here? Thor and Jane knew each other for a three-day weekend in New Mexico. This is not some great romance, Jane wants Thor to give her the hammer and he's all too willing. I respect what they were trying to do with her character - turning her into an astrophysicist instead of a nurse as in her 616 version in order to not only better fit the mythology they were trying to push, but also because her being a nurse would be redundant since Thor doesn't have the alter-ego of Donald Blake in the MCU - but the fact is that Jane Foster...is just a concept.
Pepper Potts and Peggy Carter have depth. Jane Foster does not. If you're not going to care, Marvel, then why should I care? Putting Jane in danger from dying with the Aether inside of her does not drama make. Even if Thor is invested, when he really shouldn't be beyond some sympathy for someone dying from having a mystical weapon inside of them, that doesn't mean your audience will be. We don't know anything about Jane more than the very thin veneer you've smeared over Natalie Portman.
But the plot plays out as Malekith bares down on Asgard and eventually does get the Aether before getting hoisted by his own petard. Loki dies except he doesn't, seeing as he's rather like The Master from Doctor Who in that regard, and decides to pretend to be Odin for a while, leaving some ambiguity as to where Odin is until Ragnarok comes out. In a mid-credits scene, Sif (Jaimie Alexander) and one of the Warriors Three take the Aether to the Collector, who will become much more important in Guardians.
I'm summarizing heavily here. But that's basically all there is to this film. Things happen. It's not bad, but it's just...boring, really. There's the traditional Marvel humor here and there (including a hilarious cameo from Chris Evans that almost gets topped by his appearance in Spider-Man: Homecoming), but it's just very dragged out and the ending is filled with a lot of technobabble. Christopher Eccleston as Malekith (in his first major role since his time on Doctor Who, I might add) doesn't really bring anything to the table.
He's astoundingly boring, talks in subtitles-speak, and gets defeated by Thor with the only trouble he causes being...portals. Which aren't even his doing.
Jane Foster also doesn't do anything in this film and, thought I haven't read anything confirming it, if this film were the reason why Natalie Portman didn't want to come back for Ragnarok, I can't bring myself to hold it against her. After two films of being nothing more than the arm candy for the hero, you'd want to get the hell out of it, too.
The rest of the cast isn't bad, though it's easy to see why the humans got phased out of Ragnarok. Darcy doesn't do much besides the occasional snarky quip and getting a love interest out of nowhere. Selvig is wasted in this film, which is a shame, to do nothing more than technobabble and a few comedic bits.
It's not bad, it's just...really dull. Thankfully, the MCU decided to pick right back up with the awesome in its next installment - Captain America: Winter Soldier. It's one that many have said is the best film ever in the Marvel Cinematic Universe as of the time of this writing. Is it? Well, come back in a week and we'll take a look at a darker tone, a few friends new and old for Cap, and a major change for the universe as a whole.
Thor: The Dark World is now available from Marvel Studios and Walt Disney Studios whereever movies are sold.
For the latest from the MadCapMunchkin, be sure to follow him on Twitter @MadCapMunchkin.
No comments:
Post a Comment